There are a few things on my mind. Firstly, I (Shirley) always go into a wedding being more concerned with the bride. The bride has been looking forward to her wedding her whole life. The perfect guy, dress, hair, makeup.
When, I tell a bride, "It's your wedding." It isn't intended as snarky or malicious. It's me acknowledging that you have been waiting for this your entire life. I can't even from a man's perspective. I'm not a man.
I have a lot of people that I have to answer to. Photographers, planners, venue owners, caterers, officiants, parents, bride and groom and that is just the short list. If one of these people want a song longer for their pictures, I have to do that so they get the right shot. If the venue owner wants everything to try to get done now, I need to do that. If a bridesmaid is missing an object and is asking me to track a person or the piece down, I do that.
I have loaned out my own personal real pearls to brides because theirs did not work. I have cut cakes, which is a caterers job and not mine. I have arranged bridal parties when there was not a single person to do that job.
I have done the MC thing twice now when I was sick. Once in freezing cold as the bride walks down the aisle and I could not feel my fingers. Then, we were inside and someone continued to open the door in the area in which we sat. It took weeks to get over that cold. I am still getting over that cold.
The other time, my spleen burst the day before and I'm just grateful to be alive but I still did the wedding. I am 50 years old. I am not as young as I look and I don't feel as young either.
When I make suggestions for a wedding, that is my experience talking. If, for instance, you want to toss your bouquet midway through, that's fine. At that point guests start leaving. It's not easy to get them pumped back up. We want all your major events to happen first so you can party. Your guests really do leave if they have to sit through all the things. That isn't me being horrible. That is me being real. I have seen it time and time again and then the bride cries because their families left.
If every time I'm looking for you to do that toss and you are MIA, that is a you issue. If I finally find you and ask you for that toss and you tell me, "Not right now." This is a you issue.
If you are looking for specific music and we asked for a playlist of songs you would like but we did not get the list after weeks of requesting, that is a you issue.
When you say guests can request songs, If your dad requests "Grease Lightning," from the movie Grease, we are going to play it. If your guests want "Tricky" from RUN DMC, we are going to play it.
If we sent you our questionnaire months in advance and you waited until the two weeks before your wedding to fill it out, I don't have time to perfect your timeline because I have a job in addition to what I do for the company. I need to do that timeline ASAP even if I have a wedding that same weekend. What that means is your timeline isn't perfect and I am not confident.
If your questionnaire says to shout out parents and grandparents, we are going to do that. It is hard to make last minute changes when you intentionally make yourself unavailable so you can dislike people you don't know.
If someone has a song request, nobody needs to pay us for that request that is a personal individual choice. That is called a tip. However, Gary is a mixing DJ. It takes time to find the song through his mounds of music and then find a way to mix it in.
What I want you to understand, is I would have bent over backwards for every single couple we have had. I am exhausted from waking early, packing stuff that is way too heavy for me because I am 50 and my spleen burst and I spent a week in the hospital for that. I'm exhausted being the first and last vendor there. I'm exhausted getting home at 3:00 AM and we can't even get reviews after backbreaking work. I'm exhausted of the drama. I'm exhausted from trying to make sure my brides are ok and their families yell at me or the bride isn't happy.
It kind of makes you feel a certain kind of way when you would have given your own pearls.
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